#'how do you know if a girl likes you or not 😔'

[shashapato]

Nevermore High School AU

For @cerealman ‘s 🤫🤫🤫🤫…secret santa present…😱🤫😬

(Merry Christmas!!!! Hoping this will make your day!!!)

HIGH SCHOOL AU

Lenore is a huge chemistry lover. She and Duke would be neutralising acids and bases at the back of the classroom then betting a ridiculous amount of money that the other won’t drink it. (Pluto has just given up stopping them and just began quietly handing Duke whatever he needs while half-listening to the lecture half-trying to make sure his friends don’t die.)

The misfits (COUGH COUGH Lenore COUGH) have probably set a fire by accident while teasing each other. 🥰 They all got in trouble.

Berenice wants to see blood under the microscope, but uhhhh, no one wants her cutting herself (or someone else).

Eulalie refuses to do dissections. FROGS ARE FRIENDS.

Prospero and Annabel make the BEST notes and Ada is begging for them at the end of class. (Annie gives it, of course.)

Will takes notes for Monty, and when desperate, Ada asks (DEMANDS) for them. (Will says no. 🥰)

No, but Prospero would wash his hands maybe ten times when in the lab, whether it’s touching chemicals or organs or anything. (Germaphobia, yes. 😭)

Montresor is OBSESSED with dissections. He finds it super fascinating and of course, loves feeling mushy organs and blood on his hands. (When Prospero is paired with him, he forces Monty to wash his hands.)

Dodgeball when it’s boys vs girls, Lenore is protecting all the shy unathletic girls from getting hit, becoming a sort of ‘saviour’. All of them fall heads over heels for her. 😔

Berenice and Lenore are the power duo.

Duke and Pluto WISHES they could be half as good bruh.

Eulalie looks like she’s unathletic, but she is FAST.

Annabel insists she shouldn’t play dodgeball because her nails will get in the way. (She tosses a ball at Monty’s head later for being misogynistic about that.)

Ada in PE is WILD. She and Will are the most competitive unathletic goblins ever. While Will uses his thin stature to sneak around opponents, Ada straight up tackles him, using the excuse “Oh, but we’re playing football, aren’t we?” “Not American football, god’s sake!!!”

I’m sorry, but Monty playing football (idc which football) AHHHHHH. He and Will joined the school team together of course. (William Wilson only joined to be in the changing room with Monty.)

Morella is Ada’s personal shield, because Ada has ZERO awareness of her surroundings when she’s focused. Morella has to run and block balls from hitting her.

Annabel in English class writing ramblings about how much she loves Lenore, but plays it off as only ‘fiction’. (I’ve done that once, IT WORKS!!!)

Lenore takes French so she could communicate with Duke in secret. Pluto attempted to, but backed out after a few failed exams.

Pluto now takes Japanese and Eulalie is his tutor. 😔

Monty is the kind to refuse to learn any language other than English, because it’s the ‘superior language’. (He takes German lol, I can see him speaking German...but like he knows only random words and shouts them to feel smart.)

Ada sucks at foreign languages, but thinks she is fluent. She’s the student that yells out answers with the strangest accent. 😭

Ada and Monty are the couple that’s ALWAYS kissing, but they broke up like ten times then got back together so everyone’s just confused.

Annabel and Lenore pass notes in class and when asked to read it out, Lenore EATS THE PAPER.

Poor Will tries to make friends and always fail.

Duke and Pluto are the gayest ‘straight guys’. (People assume they’re straight, but… 👀)

Eulalie is the weird kid that when you get to know becomes your best friend.

Merry and Mourn are kind of the weird teachers. 😭 They give you detention for no reason and can be strict.

Anygays, thank you! :DDD This has been fun!!!

[catastrophic-crow]

video highlights: (lowlights?)

~22:30m:

white man, having spent two hours in the same room as other white people: "i understand what you're doing, i just don't understand why! i spent the morning with these people and none of them are racist!"

~28m:

black woman, talking about the discrimination she and her child have personally experienced: "you're not hearing me."

white woman, shouting over the black woman's words: "I AM HEARING YOU!!"

even in the panel of commentators discussing this, the black woman gets shoved off into the corner and has to wait to speak up.

30m:

the same white woman when she's spoon-fed an example by a man of how racism affects people who aren't white: "oh, that's so sad 😖😔"

31m:

white man responding to the spoon-feeding of what racism is like: "well i agree with you, but it's not about colour. you could be a skin head and not want to pick your kid up from school."

......remember, kids. being descriminated against is basically the same thing as.... being a nazi????

32m:

same white woman: i agree. it's like how my husband (brags about her husband and his job before continuing) needs to wear a suit and have a particular haircut.

..........racism is when professional business attire. fascinating. if i knew where my score cards were, i'd give that particular twist and loop a seven.

".....and is he white?" lol. lmao, even

33m:

same white woman, having gotten not quite the reception she hoped for: "no, no, no! it's exactly the same!"

33:20m:

same white woman, retrospective: "but there was the assumption that racism is in particular for people who are black. and... i disagree with that. i think there's racism for white people, just as much. ... i've come across just as much discrimination in my life as, possibly, many black people have."

............."just as much." "possibly."

~34m:

question directed toward black woman commentating: "what do you think this tells us, then, about racism in Britain?"

cut to white guy answering the question: "in Britain, you've got an establishment with power—"

beyond fucking parody

34:17m:

a two second shot of the black woman the question was posed to looking at the video feeds as the white man next to her continues to answer the question, offscreen.

37:55m:

same white woman: "...one third of my class, are black children. and then i've got half-caste children. i've got one little girl, she's stunningly beautiful; she fell over, scraped all her face, and i admit i was slightly surprised that where she scraped all her face it's all pink, underneath! ...right? did i expect it to be black? i don't know."

😐

43:07m:

same white woman, retrospective, again: "for me, i didn't need to ever change my opinions. i walked in there as someone who feels very very strongly about any kind whatsoever... of that kind of behavior demonstrated by—whether it's one of my friends, or one of my children, or whatever. I've always felt very passionately about that. so i didn't need converting! and to be treated as if i was this pariah who was out there... was unacceptable anyway, so i wouldn't pay lip service to her, and my comments at the end were... more, how disappointed i was."

won't even say the word "racism."

...holy shit, if you don't watch the rest, then at least watch the last three minutes. jane elliott is ruthless when the interviewer tries to make her feel bad about hurting the poor (white) feelings.

you can say something so simple as "white women have immense white privilege and leverage whiteness every day. all white women use white supremacy for control, especially against woc, because of sociological structures" and theyre like youre such a stupid bitch I will kill you for saying this, how dare you. It's so funny they get more mad about being called racist than racism itself??? Hello??

[toxicroyjamie]

Teacher Ted AU where he moves to London in the midst of his divorce to teach a group of rowdy and disrespectful year 3's at a boys' school under the supervision of Headmaster Rebecca, who has no faith in him and is trying to get the kids to fail miserably so that she can have the school shut down and use the property it's on (which she owns) for something more profitable. But of course he gets through to the kids and turns the school around with the power of Believe and shit <3

Coach Beard gets a job alongside Ted as the gym (or whatever they do in the UK) teacher. He's very committed to his craft and takes the strategic aspect of their in-class football matches unreasonably seriously. Has the children running complicated plays

Nate is Ted's extremely shy teaching assistant who the kids push around and do not listen to in the slightest until he goes on his whole confidence journey and the kids learn to like. Be less mean

Higgins teaches the other year 3 class (2nd team?) and he and Ted frequently strategize together (this diamond dogs)

Jamie is a bully and a troublemaker who terrorizes the other kids and makes it difficult to manage the classroom, and Ted finds it really hard to make any progress with him until he finds out that Jamie is going through hell at home and is able to get through to him and work with him

Roy is a year 11 who got in trouble at his own school for his involvement in multiple fistfights and is being forced to "volunteer" (not voluntary) to help out in the little kids' classroom as part of a rehabilitation/mentoring program. He "hates it" (loves it) and "can't wait for it to be over" (is going to kill himself when it's over) and "can't stand the little pricks" (would both kill and die for them)

Keeley is also 15-16 and (actually) volunteers around the school during her free hour, because she loves it and is great with the kids <3 she runs their school insta and it looks incredible

[xxplastic-cubexx]

How would you redesign Headmaster Magneto? Just out pf curiousity because while he served it didn’t feel like… Erik.

i have to keep it 100 i have no idea without just. rerunning his original design but with a palette swap LOL but we try around here

[hopeswriting]

daily life arc miura haru. does anyone know who i'm talking about. do you guys remember her. i still can't believe what happened to her 😔

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

I've said it before, I'll say it again, and I'm sure it won't be the last time. I AM SICK AND BLOODY TIRED OF THESE MFS, HALF OF WHO DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT CURSED CHILD, BITCHING AND MOANING ABOUT AN ANGSTY TEEN DARING TO BE AN ANGSTY TEEN, I WILL FIGHT THE LOT OF YOU

(this is gonna be a bit long and probably incoherent so sit down and fucking listen to me 🔫 stick with me because I'm not just complaining about albus haters)

eVERYBODY wants cOoMmpllEeXx relatable HUMAN characters - and then SHIT themselves when the flaws a CHILD has isn't just 🥺 uwu im socially awkward and traumatised 🥺. that's why scorpius doesn't get this fuckass treatment, because his terrible human flaw is that he's a bit shit at conversation and gets sad about his dead mum (generalised understatement, but this post isnt about him. dont come for me i love him 🫶🏻)

god forbid albus, who feels unloved and unwanted (with valid evidence for a teenager), albus who feels completely out of place and outcast from his entire famously-close-knit family, ablus who is well known by the world by default via Harry and hates the attention and high expectations, albus who then gets targeted and bullied by his peers because he's not as perfect and brilliant as his father, albus who is then isolated from his one friend because Harry is making irrational ptsd fueled decisions, albus who tells Harry completely sincerely that he knows he's unlikeable but he'll try and change himself and be more like his siblings because he genuinely believes that's what Harry and everyone else whos had the misfortune of meeting him wants, albus who spends the entire play trying to prove himself and fix things via idiotic childish decisions BECAUSE HES A WHOLE UNSTABLE CHILD

god forbid that CHILD doesn't react like a patient, supported, well adjusted, level headed adult. god forbid he reacts outwardly. god forbid he reacts at all, my bad. clearly he should just sniffle a bit as if he doesn't feel suffocated and helpless by everything in his life, because obviously hes just a spoiled brat who doesn't know what real suffering is. god forbid he complains or feels anything negatively, or doesn't quite grasp that other people are struggling too because he is too busy trying so hard to deal with himself and his declining mental health the best he can with basically no support or understanding. god forbid he isn't completely perfect.

you all sound like some fucking boomer telling teenagers they don't know what real struggling is, they aren't mentally ill, they dont have any problems because they have a roof over their head, they should all go to war kids are too soft these days 😫😖😱 fUCKING‼️SHUT UP‼️

he does things wrong but he knows he does and he does everything he can to fix it! and he is fourteen!!! do none of you remember what being fourteen is like 😭😭 I swear half of you have got to be basically fourteen yourselves cmon man

cause I'm seeing this fucking pattern a lot recently. not just for albus, not just in this fandom, everywhere. ‼️ no one can fucking handle flawed characters anymore ‼️ the only thing any character is allowed to have wrong with them is trauma apparently, otherwise they have to be perfect, and I'm getting sick of it. characters and stories are meant to reflect real life, they're meant to help shape our world view, why are you expecting everyone to be fucking perfect??? what happened to nuance? what happened to understanding character development? you are all acting like characters and people are so black and white. either they're perfect or they're insufferable and evil. I won't lie, the most common victims i've noticed of this are women. but the flawed women are typically demonised, whereas the men are typically turned into uwu baby boys who actually aren't capable of doing anything wrong and then fanon goes nuts making them into ittle wittle victims. and I'm so fucking sick of all of it, I hate this. (obviously this is not a strict rule. Albus Potter, and also Albus Dumbledore now I mention it, are demonised beyond belief)

BRING BACK FLAWS AND BRING BACK NOT COMPLETELY WRITING OFF A CHARACTER BECAUSE THEY DARE TO BE HUMAN

I AM FED UP, ALBUS POTTER GET BEHIND ME

[brutal-nemesis]

big question!! dude can we please see a scene in the AU where castys has his tongue cut off and he has to deal with that? like man, the shock and the pain and the fuckin grief? and neteri just being herself ofc

anyway the latest erebus chapter was heartbreaking you’re so good at being awful to these lads (i can’t stop reading)

Thank you I try,,,,,

Okay strap in fellas I think this is banger as hell I had a great time and let me know if you have any other requests for the AU!

Castys & Terror AU Masterlist - Castys Masterlist - Next→

Ingredients: shockingly, tongue gets cut off! some suffocation as well

Castys wasn’t great at sitting in chairs normally, something his parents had always reprimanded him for, but, hey, they’d never taken it as far as to fucking tie him to one, and Castys was grateful. This shit was uncomfortable. Like, yeah, the rough ropes around his wrists and ankles were tight and itchy, but also the position just sucked. Not that he’d rather be standing or something-

“You must be Castys!” The door had swung open, and now this little lady with a white coat on was walking up to him. 

“Yes, I’m Castys,” he said flatly as she scurried behind him before coming back without her bag. And then she just…stared at him. Castys wasn’t sure what she was looking at, since there really wasn’t much to see, just, like, him. Eventually her eyes wandered up to his, and she jumped in place a bit.

“Oh, right, I’m Neteri.” She stuck her hand out like she expected him to shake it.

“You know I’m tied up, right?”

“Ah. Yeah.” Her skin was dark enough that it wasn’t immediately obvious that she was blushing, but Castys was pretty sure she was. She ended up awkwardly grabbing his right hand and shaking it a bit. “I, um, I’ll be preparing you for this afternoon. Sorry, I’m just a bit nervous.”

“Well, you’re not tied to a chair so I think you’ll be okay.”

She laughed. “You’re right, you’re right, but I’m just…I think I’m going to do something I’m not supposed to do.”

Castys raised an eyebrow. “Let me go because I’m funny?”

Neteri rolled her eyes, but she was smiling, so clearly she did think he was funny. “No, you’re staying put, sorry bud. But I think I’m going to keep you. You’re kind of perfect.” She tried to cup his cheek in her hand, but Castys leaned away, staring at her with wide eyes.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” His mouth was really dry all of a sudden, he wasn’t perfect, he was a fuck-up, a useless heir, that had been his goal, he wasn’t good at anything he was supposed to be good at, he wasn’t well-mannered or polite, he had a huge fucking scar on his face and a lopsided smile because of it, he was filthy and vulgar and didn’t have any interest in getting married he was absolutely anything but perfect. So why the hell did she want him?

“It’s not important right now. You’ve got a big day ahead of you!” She clapped her hands, dismissing the subject entirely. He wanted to press her further, but after seeing the lovely object she pulled out of her pocket, everything else was forgotten.

“No. Absolutely not.”

“Aw, what are you gonna do about it, Castys? I thought you were tied to a chair!” Great, now it was his turn to feel his face grow hot, because, yeah, what the fuck was he gonna do?

Normally, he doubted he’d immediately recognize it for what it was, but today, right now, after just being told this lady wanted to keep him, it was instantly clear. And Neteri was right, he was only able to squirm uselessly and lean away as she wrapped the collar around his neck without much trouble. His first swallow after she’d sealed it shut felt horrible, and he absolutely did not want to get used to it.

“See, it’s not so bad. It looks cute on you!” She ruffled his hair, which only made Castys more uncomfortable.

“I don’t want to be cute. I’m not a fucking dog.” He wasn’t sure whether the collar was part of Neteri’s weird desires or just to humiliate him, but either way he hated it.

“No, you’re not, but you’re also not a prince anymore, and you’re the property of the Xernan Empire, and this is a good reminder of that,” Neteri said as she walked around behind him, probably to her bag. Castys rolled his eyes. He didn’t need to be reminded that he wasn’t a prince, since it was his favorite new development in all of this. Unless…unless it wasn’t just a reminder for him, but for everyone else, too…He really, really hoped there wasn’t going to be some sort of public display, but given how Neteri’d said he had a “big day” ahead…fuck, that was probably the case, huh?

“Now, I’m going to…oh, I might get in so much trouble for this,” Neteri muttered as she stared at the floor, standing in front of him once again. She had leather gloves on, which would have been nice earlier when she was touching him, and she was holding…a pair of shears? He didn’t think she’d put on gloves if she was just going to cut his hair, and given that she thought she might get in trouble for it, it seemed like she was going to…maim him somehow. Castys curled his hands into fists as Neteri slapped her cheeks with her palms, still talking to herself. “No, I’m going to do this. I deserve it. It’s not that far off from what the emperor wants. Okay,” she held the shears up and gave Castys a concerningly bright smile. “Any last words?”

For once, Castys didn’t take the opportunity to speak.

Instead, he locked his jaw shut tight, teeth clenched so hard it hurt, lips pressed together, walls of protection around his tongue. 

That’s what she wanted, wasn’t it?

Neteri cocked her head, watching him. “Nothing to say all of a sudden? No jokes?” Her smile disappeared as her eyes narrowed. “You figured it out, didn’t you, Castys? What I’m going to do to you.”

He didn’t bother nodding.

Neteri stepped up to him, her knee on the chair in between his legs, leaning over him, her face right above his as he craned back to avoid her. “You’re going to have to get used to obeying me, Castys.” The cold metal of the shears rested on his cheek. “So open your mouth.”

If there’s one thing Castys was good at, it was disobeying orders.

After a few moments of neither of them moving, Neteri pinched Castys’s nose shut with her free hand, not saying a word. Fine, he could play that game. Hold on as the pressure in his chest built, as his head started to spin, as his vision started to darken, every fiber of his being screaming at him to just give in to the inevitable and take a breath. He could do it quick, a little gasp, fast enough that she wouldn’t be able to do anything. Okay, three, two…

The exhale was shaky, but it was fine, just a quick inhale as he snapped his mouth shut-

His teeth scraped against metal, the sensation sending shivers down his spine.

Neteri stared at him with a detached coldness as she rotated the shears, forcing his jaw open wide, wide enough for her to stick her hand in and grab his tongue, pulling it out despite his attempts to pull it back, turning the shears to the side now, opening them up, the cold blades-

Snip.

Castys’s mouth was hot it was burning he was choking the smell of blood was so strong he was suffocating on it her hand was still in his mouth her fingers pressed against his wound magic piercing through his jaw he’d scream if he had the air and then that was it her hand was gone he lurched forward coughing and spitting blood and saliva all down the front of the threadbare shirt he’d been given and once he saw the discarded little piece of pink flesh on the floor he couldn’t look at anything else he couldn’t believe that was it it was gone it wasn’t in his mouth his mouth was empty there was only the blood still dripping out and when Neteri laid a hand on his back he wanted to growl at her not to touch him but he couldn’t he couldn’t say anything anymore he was quiet nothing to say no thoughts or opinions of his own just how his parents had wanted him-

“It’s alright, Castys, just breathe. It was a little more difficult than it needed to be, but you did it.” And why did it need to be at all? “Just two more things left today and then you can rest. And then hopefully…” Her hand slid up, resting on the back of his neck, on that awful collar, and Castys wanted to scream. He never, ever wanted to belong to her.

But what he wanted didn’t matter anymore.

Castys was dragged out and whipped and branded and left out on display, brought back and patched up by Neteri and given soup that he couldn’t taste, and when the door slammed shut behind her, he finally allowed himself to cry.

His back and chest hurt, of course, the wounds aggravated no matter how he moved or what position he laid in, but he could deal with it. It was nothing compared to what he’d lost, the little pocket of empty space inside his mouth.

Words were all he’d ever have to really fight back, complaining when he was forced to do things he didn’t want to, scaring off all the suitors his parents picked out, jokes keeping him calm when he was scared or upset, even when he couldn’t do anything he could still say something, make sure everyone knew how he felt, and now he was more helpless than ever before and he couldn’t say a single fucking thing. 

He didn’t even know where he was going to end up, either sold off to some asshole or left in Neteri’s clutches, and no matter what, he wasn’t going to be treated like a person. The collar made it pretty clear. He was less than human now, a pet, a lab rat, property, something that didn’t need to have thoughts or opinions anymore. 

He’d rather be a prince after all.

Castys Cult: @as-a-matter-of-whump​ @blackrosesandwhump​ @fanmanga1357-blog​​ @thehopelessopus​ @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi

@hearse-song​ @muddy-swamp-bitch @whumpasaurus101 @yet-another-heathen​​ @galaxywhump 

@starnight-whump​ @his-unspoken-words​ @misspelledwitch @suspicious-whumping-egg​ @pumpkin-spice-whump​ 

@painsandconfusion @i-can-even-burn-salad @befuddled-calico-whump​ @whumpinggrounds​ @whump-queen​

@whumpedydump

[lotus-pear]

actually tearing my hair out bc i sat down to review my fic today since i’m getting close to the publication date (i think i should mention that i write in first person for the initial draft because it goes smoother during the writing process since i’m literally just projecting what’s in my head onto the screen and then go back to change it to third person later) BUT AS I WAS GOING THROUGH THE CHAPTERS IT SOUNDED SO GOOD IN FIRST PEROSN POV :((((((((( but reading fp is kinda cringe imo so i tend to avoid it for the final draft but like AUGH IDK i’m in a dilemma I NEED HELP DECIDING

[jam-packed]

thank god im not a journalist cus the amount of eye contact would kill me

[lesbianlenas]

ok here is the thing…..i was thinking to myself abt why it is that i am like i truly cannot connect w these ppl on a fundamental level that i go to law school w like i talk to ppl and stuff but here it is this is the problem these ppl are SO NORMAL. all they talk abt is NORMAL THINGS. like they r just like idk!!! i was thinking to myself like you know on a scale of telling a person all of my intrusive thoughts (i have friends i do this w) to do not even know my last name level these ppl do not even hit i can text them and make them vote for my favorite bb houseguest for afp……they’d be like why tf are u asking me this. like THAT level normal. let alone could i EVER reveal my intense love affair w supercorp the pairing of supergirl and lena luthor from the cw series supergirl (2015-2022) like?? they do not get me they could never get me……why do no ethical freaks go to law school. do u know how hard it is to hide being a FREAK surrounded by NORMIES. it’s harder than hiding my homosexuality….and NO they are NOT on the level where i could reveal my lesbian status either just bc i like ppl to deduce that for themselves if they are enlightened enough. and are they? perhaps but idc. the ONLY friend of mine that reached the i will say in passing smth that reveals i am definitely gay level w me transferred so i am like oh it’s hopeless now i truly only have the normies…….like can i be real w u all i am being so serious rn. NO freaks NO lesbians NO lesbians who can match MY freak specifically every day i wake up and go to normie school and i have to pretend to be ok w it. well i am NOT!!! but thats ok……we move.

[swallowtail-ageha]

Uuugh i am! So frustrated! Like there is this friend of mine who is quite nice but also has zero critical thinking skills. No reflection no thought of her own most of it is repeating things she has heard. Like she has an opinion then i'll tell mine (which is often completely different) and she'll backtrack her opinion by quoting verbatim me it's like!!! Idk!!!! Develop some indipendent thought!!!!! I feel bad for saying this but sorry it's too frustrating!

[catboyfurina]

Idk what precisely to call it since honorifics aren't Pronouns but vertin using she/her while routinely being addressed as Lord, sir, etc is soooooooo 🥰 it's like mixed pronouns but not.

[leslieseveride]

i wholeheartedly can't wait to hear what fatherly words of wisdom grey is going to bestow upon lucy whilst she's still spiraling from her sudden breakup with tim. he looks like he's genuinely concerned for her well being in that clip of them in the shop together, i hope that he clocks whatever it is the others aren't cause i can't stand how she's been walked all over on so far this season. 🥺💕

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Magneto would love lumpia meanwhile Charles would have his Bibingka and Puto Bungbong hehe

Happy Holidays!

asks that remind me my bitchass friend kayla promised to make me *puto two years ago and she still hasnt

*puto is a filipino rice cake i do know it also means 'bitch' in spanish we do not have to address that thank you

[rustbeltbabey]

one of our regulars is an Indian man n when he first came in we asked for his name n he said "put PV on it". but he just got the app the other day so now his real name comes up n I saw it yesterday making his latte and now I just went thru about 200 different Punjabi and Hindi names starting w P trying to find it so I can learn how to pronounce it properly n I CANT FIND IT 😭 ubey menya. guess I'll have to just wait til he comes in again n write it down but now it's bothering me..

[maddy-ferguson]

talking to new people again is making me realize that (this is gonna sound dramatic) i haven't lived in five years but what i have done is watch a lot of movies and read a bunch of books and believe it or not that actually makes me an interesting conversationalist in some ways (?)